Friday, November 20, 2009

The Monastic Squad of Mp3 Awesomeness!!!

file:///F:/06-Sha%20La%20La.MP3 (right click to listen the rad awesomeness)

The Monastic Squad of MP3 Awesomeness!!!

I find it intriguing how funny random things appear in life. The stories of these disturbing pictures began with an e-bay transaction gone wrong. Not so long ago, I decided to look on e-bay for a small mouse for my new laptop. Something cheap but useful. I found one from a buyer from China at almost $3.00. These are the kind of things you buy on e-bay, things that don't concern so much the quality of the product but the almost immediate satisfaction of a vane need. Whatever works when you are not concerned with the brand tag but more with the price tag. The mouse arrived two weeks later, and it works wonderfully. And so I decided to buy another for someone else. After all, it's just $3.00 right?

What I wasn't expecting is this : Sunglasses MP3 Player!!! Apparently, whoever sold the mouse to me, got himself or herself so utterly confused that they sent me an mp3 player instead of a mouse. When I first received this rad and cool-wannabe glasses, with its ridiculously cheap-looking plastic, but best of all, with awesome "flip up lens" and "Extended Binaural earphones with stereo sound"(not kidding) I thought: WTH? Why in the world would I want this? I thought it was some sort of practical joke from my parents, since I asked them for an ipod nano for Christmas. Yeah they probably are having a good laugh about it, and saying"oh, so you wanna be cool and hip with an iPod?, why don't you try this rad awesomeness instead?". But the box came from China, and maybe my e-bay seller ran out of mouses and thought the sunglasses would be a pretty cool replacement. As part of the product features it says: "This product employs imported lenses, with trendy shields UV, glare and diffused light, allowing you to enjoy music in the sun without disturbance". Yes, if by trying to look trendy but failing miserably into dorkyness does not disturb you, then the claim is perfectly logical. And so I brought the glasses to the Augustinian community where I live, and we had a good laugh about it. My vocational director told me something like "those look like someone trying to be cool but failing". My pre-novitiate brother, who we will call "Joe"(pictured in the second disturbing picture), tried them. The vocational director then said "Yes, you look dorky" Indeed. I wouldn't be caught dead wearing this, and just entertaining the thought of wearing it to school robs me of every possible self-dignity. And since we were playing poker while we tried them on (and oddly enough, danced with them on) we entertained the idea that the loser would have to lose his self-dignity by wearing it one day to school, but the prospects of losing being so great, we abandoned the idea completely.

Worse of all, it came pre-loaded with songs. 3 actually. Two pop songs in Chinese, and the best, a song called "Sha La la" that is just laughable with its synthesized audio vomit. "Sha-la la la la, Sha la la la in the morning, sha la la la la, sha la la la in the sunrise" (I uploaded the song as a file, right click to listen, preferably while you read this). The song is now stuck to my head. And unfortunately I'm now stuck with this product, as the possibilities of me returning it seems unlikely, for whatever reasons.

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